Sunday, November 30, 2008

Burning 4 U, Jason Alexander

Tonight I watched the 1981 slasher flick The Burning. Directed by Tony Maylam, it's got the basic 80s slasher film plot, and the basic 81 slasher film GORE. So basically- Its AWESOME. It also has a foxy 21 year old Jason Alexander (with hair!!), Tom Savini on special effects, a very eeriee synthy 80s score, over-sized shirts and baseball tees galore, and LOTS of boobs. Thats not the best part though, the best part is that Holly Hunter is in it and you would never even know it! In fact, I still don't even know which girl she was!! and I watched the entire thing! It's great!

Plot is simple- One night at Camp Blackfoot, a group of boys decide to give the nasty ol caretaker Cropsy a good, mean ol scare. They do this by leaving a flaming, worm infested skull on his dresser as he sleeps, and then awaking him by tapping on his window. The plan, surprisingly, goes horribly wrong and leaves mean ol Cropsy looking like some melted macaroni and cheese. Icky. Five years pass and Crispy is finally ready to be released from the hospital, and apparently ready for some sweet, sweet revenge, too.

The rest of the picture is set at a summer camp, revolving around a new set of fresh-faced, fun teens. The killing begins, and so goes another slasher movie. It isn't terribly original, but are many slashers movies? Or many horror movies for that matter? In some ways I found it to be a lot more effective than Friday the 13th, which is obviously very similar, although that could be just because I've seen Friday a million times now. Still though, I found a lot to love in this one, and overall just a lot more enjoyable than the first Friday the 13th. Maylam does a good job of keeping the kids around for awhile, which is nice, letting the mayhem begin when the kids go on a canoeing trip rather than just when wondering around the camp. I was watching the commentary after and what the director says is really true- save for one or two obnoxious assholes, all of the characters are extremely likeable and great, and it hurts to see them go. The effects are obviously amazing, and the movie is also full of some great jump moments that really scare, too, with one that'll prob make you spill your pepsi all over like I did. Excellent!

When the film was released in 81 it was docked with the Video Nasty term, a name given to films that were extremely explicit and like, really gross. And it's true, this one really delivers the nasty goods, so to speak, and it's wonderful. What is also wonderful is that now I'm able to refer to my bed as Bed Nasty because I spilt pepsi all over my comforter, and thats pretty gross!

And I was joking when I said that Holly Hunter was the greatest part about the movie, as if that could ever happen, hahaha. No really, the greatest part about it is the foxy 21 year old Jason Alexander, because it proves that every star in the 80s was attractive. And that I have crushes on the weirdest people.

Other things of note- this was Miramax's first film, and the Weinstein brothers were behind it! Nice! Yes, the raft scene IS incredible, and the fade to red was especially beautiful. Also, this is NOT Friday the 13th, but if you see this movie alone...You'll never be the same again!!! Nor will your favorite comforter!!! So thanks Jason Alexander, and thank you Burning.

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